The Lonely Years

I'm just going to go ahead and be honest-- The last 5 years have been a tough season, the loneliest years of my life! Obviously there are a lot of different factors. For one, 5 years ago we started fresh by moving across the country. Being away from family and established relationships requires you to start over.

In addition to starting over, the progress is slowed a bit more in the season of parenting young children. If you socialize with your kids along, there are many interruptions, so it is difficult to have deep conversations. After awhile, you do learn to put your conversation on hold to some extent while tending to your kids. But a simple conversation takes a lot more work.

For many parents, too, it's harder to get away- even for just a few hours. For us, we prioritize giving the other freedom to have some time to go out with friends or go chill somewhere. But many times alternating schedules, we have to do a lot of coordinating with each other just to be able to get away a bit, not to mention coordinating with those we are trying to connect with.

I hate the feeling of being surrounded by people, yet being lonely. Sometimes, I am just feeling empty (like I got nothing left in me) when it's time to try to connect with someone so it's hard to pour out. Other times, I have worked my tail off all day that at the end of the day when others are ready to socialize, I'm so tired that my brain and heart and no longer operable.

To top it off, I'm also an introvert. When it works to get out, see past interruptions, and energy to socialize... I have to then warm up to a person, which takes a little longer for us introverts. Sometimes after you've spent some time getting to know someone, turns out they just aren't a match for you and it's time to start again. :)

Now that I've brought you up to speed, here's the truth...

Parenting young kids is a season. There won't always be interruptions and long hours. Even though it's been a tough season, I am doing a good job keeping my focus and knowing my job right now is an important one. My peace, my focus, who I am made to be right now in this season... is found in keeping my heart at home.  I am thankful for the grace others have on me during this season of not always having it together. And if they don't understand, I have grace on them.

And no matter how crazy the season you are in in, it's so important to make community a priority in your life. Relationship-building takes intention. I'm a firm believer in that we need people in our lives... to know our joys, our saddnesses, to know us. Right now, I'm organizing my fall, looking at groups I can be a part of so I have that as an element in my life on a weekly basis.  I know at different times in our lives finding time to connect with others can be hard, but having people in our circle is so important, so be intentional.